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After Care, Care In The After A BDSM Session
What do you like to do or do to you after a sexual relationship? Do you talk to your partner about what you like? We are still in the BDSM session world, but today we are talking about the post-session period, an essential time to have fun and have fun. In Clapps! We continue to inquire about various sexual practices and ways to carry it out.
After the large number of questions, queries and messages that I received from the first LatSex note that talks about BDSM, I decided to go a little deeper into some points that were the most asked . The 2 topics that were most repeated had to do with the “consensus” and the “aftercare”. In this case I am going to talk a little about the second, since I would like to investigate a little more about the first before writing.
For starters, I would like to highlight that when I told you about this post-session BDSM period, it seemed to manyx “very crazy”, but when I explained a little more about what it was about they realized that it was not really a very crazy idea of BDSM session, but it would be good if it is applied on other occasions.
After care, after a BDSM session
For those who did not read the first note where I refer to this (they should if they want to learn more), aftercare is the time or period after a BDSM session , in which participants have a moment to meet their needs psychological, physical or emotional. This has to do with the fact that the activity is a kind of roller coaster of emotions, that is why investigating I discovered that it is to avoid the sometimes called “ subdrop ”, which would be a low state that occurs as a result of the strong increase in adrenaline and endorphins that can leave participants vulnerable.
The aftercare period is different for everyone. Let’s think about what happens to us in a vanilla relationship (for those who do not know, what most people know as sex / penetration / orgasms -if the woman arrives-) , after the sexual act some of them like to stay Embraced, others just light a cigarette or bathe and even some need to be silent. We can list a hundred more examples, but I want to show that for each one it is different.
After care, talk about how it feels
Now, let’s return to the BDSM world, there is almost an obligation aftercare, almost inconceivable that it does not happen after session, but how do I know that the other likes it afterwards? The answer is quite simple, but some surprised faces when I was talking about it made me realize that it wasn’t… The best way to know what the otrx needs and what unx likes after meeting is ! TALKING ABOUT IT! It looks like a boludes, but it needs to be clarified. You have to ask, chat and exchange that information.
I must admit that at first it seemed shocking, I do not know why, but I was surprised with the idea of speaking all before, that is why it is for all my heteronormative education and my preconceptions , as well as it can be very formal if you are not used. But then I understood that it is much more sensible to communicate and express yourself.
After Care, communicating is also enjoying
There is no need to be afraid to ask, aftercare does not mean that they are going to have a serious relationship, especially considering the current times, where casual sex is a little more within the reach of some swipes, clicks or likes . Because there is kindness, and because the other person wants to know what you like and what you don’t, does not mean that they want to marry you or a serious relationship.
Communication is essential in a BDSM session, but it should be in all sexual relationships. It is impossible to guess and read the mind to know what the other would like, to avoid that there is no better way than to speak it in the most natural and sincere way possible, without taboos or shame, after all, that will make the moment of intimacy better for both of us.
After Care, tips to build a kit
To end the aftercare, a friend and arguably my biggest source of trust when it comes to BDSM, shared the Instagram of Kinky Bunny , which sells BDSM clothing and accessories , but also does good translations and texts on the subject. . From there I took the tips on how to put together an aftercare kit, which I transcribed below so that they take note.
· Paracetamol (it is not necessary to clarify what is its use),
· Cream Analgesic , can be used for pain in specific areas, especially for pain that occurs from inflammation.
· Aloe Vera , to hydrate and refresh the skin after the session, also gives the sensation of freshness and helps to deflate.
· Body Oil , good massages help us relax, circulate blood and loosen muscles. Oily pampering can be a great way to feel comfortable and cared for.
· Relaxing tea is a great way to make us feel in comfort.
· Treats help stabilize blood sugar levels and are a nice gesture that never hurts.
· Aromatic soap , after the session some need to bathe, so having a special soap with a relaxing fragrance enhances the positive of bathing, giving a daily situation a special and comfortable touch.
· Hair brush , for many brushing or brushing your hair is a relaxing situation, it also contributes to grooming to see and feel better.
Kinky Bunny ends the post saying: “ It is ideal to have all these things different from the ones we use every day. If we get used to this, our head will automatically associate them, which will make it easier to relax and feel safe. You need to talk and know how to make your playmate feel content. ” . This is a little more information about the aftercare , an instance that would be good BDSM session for us to learn and incorporate in our relationships. At the end of the day, we always want to have fun and have fun, there is no better way to achieve that than when the parties understand each other and know what they like.